You cannot drown in the Dead Sea.
Well, I suppose you could if you were really desperate. But I don't recommend it. The water is too buoyant because of all the salt. The water is nasty too. Everything dies in this sea and turns to black sludge at the bottom that could be mistaken for something else. Visitors scoop up handfuls of this black crap and rub it on their bodies and faces.
Apparently this is good for you and has all sorts of healing effects. I rubbed my body with this black goo and must admit that it did make me feel different. I wouldn't say that it made me feel ten years younger or 30 pounds lighter. For sure, I felt much dirtier than before application of said goo. I felt like I needed a shower. The smell made me feel like puking. Perhaps this is medicinal.
If you can't make it to the Dead Sea, you can purchase this stinky black goo for exorbitant prices from online stores and select spas all over the world. But if you go to the Dead Sea, you go with a feeling of obligation to float in the salty water and bath your body in the black mud.
Our youngest daughter, Emma, was not so easily convinced. At six-years-old, she was wary of entering a sea called the "Dead Sea" because it must mean that people die there. After much parental coaxing, she took a couple of cautious steps into the water, but immediately retreated to the shore.
"I can feel the bones of the dead people," she cried.
"Those aren't bones, they're rocks," her mother said. "Come on silly."
Emma walked out cautiously again to her mother's waiting arms. While she overcame the imaginary bones beneath her feet, she could not withstand the very real burning that the salt water causes when it opens any scrape, cut or other body cavity opening.
I can attest to this. My ass was on fire as I floated in the Dead. It's like I'd just been administered an enema of habañeros sauce.
After repeating "no pain, no gain" for a couple of minutes, I realized that I was getting no gain from the pain and should get my ass out of the warm salty water and to a cold shower.
